Most people want to eat their cake and still have it. They want to have the benefits of being in a relationship yet they don't want to be committed in any way. That is why they settle for a no-strings-attached kind of thing.
According to Wikipedia this is where two people decide to engage in a sexual relationship that has no ties or expectation with regards to finances, exclusivity or romance. Literally, there are no strings binding the two together.
Most women say they are cool with it, at first it is all fun and games until feelings start cropping up. Men hardly get attached because they get casual with girls they know they will never end up with! Yes it is only natural to start developing feelings for the person you sex several times. Especially if its a sober decision. This can scientifically be explained as thus: The key hormone released during sex called oxytocin, lowers our defenses and makes us trust people more. It makes women want to cuddle and get attached after sex.
When the man has orgasm on the other hand, the main hormone released is dopamine - the pleasure hormone, that has a high effect just like the cocaine high and can be addictive. That is why he keeps calling you, not because he likes you so much, but because he wants that high he got, that pleasure he got after the sex you had. If he likes you that much, how come he doesn't know your second name? or what gets you? or have something more with you?
He will not bother to spoil you, because he already tasted the cookie. When you start asking for stuff he says you are nagging. He feels the pinch every time he has to spend a dime on you, you can read his face. There are so many words left unspoken. He never compliments you, never bothers to hook up with you in the light, he waits for the stick to direct him, then he can call when the night falls.
When you are going through stuff you cant talk to him, because he freaks out when the conversations start getting personal. Sometimes all a woman wants to do is cry and speak to someone about deep stuff. You'll always get along, because hell, it doesn't have to last. Anytime he calls you don't have to call back. You don't have to ask what he is doing, or who he is doing for that matter. Everyone wants a lover like that, always playing fire under covers, never catching feelings, never fighting, never airing your opinions and allowing the other person to mute you.
After the sex what next? Every man thrills in pursuing a woman. When you roll in his sheets that's it, he has lost the zeal and interest and respect even for you. Sorry to disappoint you honey but casual sex hardly ever amounts to anything. It will be a relationship built on no trust because both of you will be looking over your shoulder thinking the other person is cheating.
Now that we know that women get attached unknowingly, what should THE MAN do:
Men, stop stringing women along:
Well for starters men should stop confusing women! Don't cuddle with the woman you just want to roll in the sheets with. Don't call her to talk about your day. Don't talk about your future or anything that will make her believe that you want more.
Don't buy her small gifts..
Most women are into chocolates! Okay I am so into chocolates and sweet nothings. Yeah, yeah, I know sometimes its a copy-pasted text BUT yaaay it gets me! Don't buy her chocolates or anything if you aren't that into her. Just let the buying out..Otherwise you are sending mixed signals. Don't send texts with sweet nothings either that get women all giggly and dreamy.
Stop before it gets too complicated...
This is my number one rule. When you notice that she is beginning to be all
There are some biblical principles that can be applied to no strings attached. Teaching us to keep our bodies for only that ONE man within MARRIAGE. Ephesians 5:3 says: 'But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints'
My favorite bible verse when it comes to sexual matters is 1 Corinthians 6: 18-20. This should direct us in what we do with our bodies. Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. 19Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
If you wanna have a SANCTIFIED marriage someday, stay PURE. Once you get all naked with a man, your worth goes down, its like your price tag is changed, well to a LESSER value, he will only see you as a sex object and will not try to know you outside the bedroom. If you as a woman are unable to control your sexual urges, you need deliverance! No really you do. We should learn to have self control according to....Proverbs 25:28 A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls. But at the end of the day, what do you feed your mind? Do your conversations with whoever revolve around sex? Who do you hang out with? Our parents used to urge us to maintain 'HOLY GAPS' when hanging out with men. Now I see why.
The next time you feel tempted to call up your fling, fight the feeling. Bury your heart in God's word. Don't ALLOW your flesh to rule you.
You cant make chicken salad out of chicken shit.
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